My father was a minister, a District Superintendent for the Methodist Church. My second brother was also a minister, and Bishop for the Southwestern Region of the Methodist Church. That region included Missouri, Arkansas, Louisiana, Oklahoma and Texas. They were both good preachers, but I often heard them struggling, trying to understand the doctrines of their church, enough so that they could explain these strange concepts to those to whom they preached. How do you explain that absolutely insane doctrine of a virgin birth, resurrection from a totally necrotic death, a strange human apparition called the Holy Ghost which pervades all of the known universe, a superhuman human who was both alive and dead, as well as in this world and out of it, some deity which loves all of us but is constantly directing us to kill each other off, and some kind of three-headed monster called the Trinity which contains all of these bizarre elements? That was a daunting task for them, and they came up with some really contorted reasons as to why these doctrines were accurate. All of that twisted reasoning was false, of course. They were each trying to understand the beliefs for which they worked, and which gave them employment. They both meant very well, but failed to reach the enlightenment that these wild concepts did not make any sense, simply because they were mythology. Mythology is purely fanciful leaps of imagination. It will never make any literal sense. It may teach us great morals, but to believe it literally is to live in darkness. Unfortunately, there are large segments of the human population who are so wedded to their particular strange mythology that they kill, murder and destroy to protect it. How deeply sad; but all of that is fodder for another forum.
Even though my father and my brother were lost as to the eccentric mythology of their church, which became wildly irrational if accepted literally, they were no fools when it came to human motives. They both had to deal with people, congregations and districts where some were dependable and others were not. My father always told us that there were some people who were dependable, who could work on their own, and would devote their effort to take care of any decent job, with vigor, and without external direction. Then there are many others, he said, who won’t do anything unless you force them to do so in some way. My brother took that lesson to heart, and it served him well during his stewardship and bishopry in the Methodist Church. It took me quite a while. I remember my mother asking me, when I was a teen, to pull a heavy bag up from the back yard to the house, and I refused. I was too busy to bother with such a menial task. Then I saw her struggling to pull that bag up to house, and realized I had been a pretty selfish kid. It was not until I was in graduate school, and had a summer job at the University of Iowa, in the library, when I became dependable. The director assigned me to clean up, categorize and sort books in a back building which was not used for anything but storage. There was no one else there to direct or watch me. It occurred to me, one hot summer day, while I was sorting through dusty old books, that this was the first time I was doing my job without someone constantly having to look after me to make sure I was doing that job. It has stayed that way since. It has been like a bad disease that you can’t shake; if it is my job, then I stick at it until it is done. In some parlances of the language, I think this is called a curse; in a more rational sense, it is called maturity.
When I retired from surgery in 2004, and we set up practice as a primary care provider, we had a great influx of two major categories of patients that we knew existed, but had no idea they existed in such large numbers: patients seeking pain medicine, and those seeking disability. I have addressed that pain management problem in a separate discussion. This one is about that large flood of patients who came in the door looking for someone to ascertain that they do not have to work anymore. It hasn’t changed since those initial days. Many days, it seems that over 90% of the people I see are unemployed, and 50% of them are on or are requesting disability. They have no interest in and are actually opposed to working in any capacity for the rest of their lives. They all fervently believe that they are owed free food, lodging, drugs, clothing, televisions and cell phones for the rest of their lives. I reluctantly admit, this grinds against my soul. I remember all too well the days I made rounds at the hospital in a wheelchair, because my back hurt fiercely, and every step was painful. On two separate occasions, my assistant wheeled me for around for over a week, and I had to kneel by each bedside to see my patients, because it hurt too much to stand. I did not take narcotics. I never missed work, regardless of the illness or fatigue. I did not complain. I did my job, because it was my responsibility. Now, I see a steady stream of patients who complain greatly of pain in various areas of their bodies, and state that is the reason they can no longer work in any capacity. I am sure that, for many of them, their MRI’s of various body areas look better than mine, but for them this is an incapacitating illness. They are not like the 80 plus year old who comes to me with coronary artery disease, COPD, hypertension, hyperlipidemia, and cannot walk 100 feet rapidly without dyspnea. He still mows lawns and does odd jobs for a living. He often wryly states that the people for whom he works are in much better health than he is. It is more a difference in attitude than it is a difference in actual physical health.
That, of course, leaves us with a major question: why are some people never willing to bear responsibility for their lives? The greatly obese persons claim that their immense body weight prevents them from ever doing any work, even though their morbid status is entirely of their own doing. The auto accident survivors claim that they are too torn up to ever work again. Those who have been in an industrial accident claim that the company for which they worked owes them sustenance for the rest of their lives. Some of those who have had successful surgery claim that they have ever since that time had incapacitating back, abdominal, chest or joint pain. Those who have mild arthritis claim that their joints all hurt too much for them to bear any physical burdens. Those who have some type of digestive disorder state that they have too much abdominal pain to be employed at any job. Those who are doing illegal drugs state that they are too emotionally deprived to be able to give up that habit. Those who drink heavily state that this is what they have to do to get through life. Those who can’t breathe but are still smoking state that they have tried to quit, but it just didn’t work. Those who have been through a life threatening illness before state that this illness has left them too emotionally scarred to ever work again.
There are many in these categories who have legitimate need, but there are far too many for whom it is simply an excuse to be irresponsible. Maybe it is simply that they have never been given adequate love and security during their childhood to achieve that maturity that is necessary to be responsible and reliable. Maybe they have never been given love laced with demands and expectations. Maybe they have never had a parent who demonstrated by personal action what it is like to suffer through trial and deprivation, yet do their job to the best of their ability. Maybe what we should do is concentrate more on better parenting in our society. What the root causes of this immaturity and irresponsibility are, remain somewhat obscure. What is clear to me is that we have a large volume of people in our society who are unwilling to work, and are using any excuse they can think of to convince someone else they should be coddled for the rest of their lives.
The human social world does not prosper with a steady burden of horrifying violence. That deprives all of us of live, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. It also does not prosper with unconditional love, as some of our religious teachers tell us. If we show only giving toward those who are violent or irresponsible, we will either be sucked dry or dead, with rapidity. Human society only prospers with tough love. Regardless of the reason for their immaturity, all persons must be held accountable for their own actions. From where I stand, and from what I see every day, we are not practicing tough love. We are fostering a generation of irresponsible adults, narcotic addicts, smokers and alcoholics who are sucking all the rest of us dry. We are producing a welfare society which threatens to drag all the rest of us down to oblivion. It is time to say “put up or shut up”. We have a threatened welfare catastrophe on our hands. Our politicians and bureaucrats have a crucial lesson to learn about responsibility, before our welfare system produces a bloated, totally fatal, human society illness, in which far too few, are supporting far too many.
That catastrophe is well on its way.